Tuesday, September 13, 2005

The Hottest Young Conservative Writer On The Internets

...speaks about the blatant infiltration of Hollyweird with LeninoMarxianFascistobuttwipes.

Yosef's Treatise on Communist Undertones Inherent in "The A-Team":

After the 4 members of the A-Team left the military, accused of a crime they didn't commit, they went about the United States as fugitives. As they were constantly trying to flee the MPs, they would constantly come upon small towns and try to hide out there. Now we all know that every small town in the US has one very very hot lower-middle class babe who got her typing certificate from a community college in the next county, making her the most educated person in said small town.

Enter "Face". Each member of the A-Team has a special ability: Hannibal is a natural leader and a masterful strategist; Murdock has no inhibitions and can disguise himslef as women whenever he needs to; B.A. Barrachus has almost superhuman strength (and he pities fools); Face, well he has the most important of all abilities - good looks. Face is the charmer. As the A-Team stops at a local watering hole, they always notice a beautiful woman entreating 2 male bluecollar workers to quit drinking and just go home. They are her father and brother. After a heated discussion, the young lady is invariably drawn to the looks and charm of Face. As she joins him and the other guys for a drink, she tells of the problems that have led her father and brother to drink heavily.

It seems that in every town our heroes visit, there is a factory that employs nearly everyone who lives in the area. The local workers are all paid extremely low wages for very difficult work, but they have to settle for it, because the owner of the factory has threatened to move it to another county where the people would be happy to work for the same amount of money - if not less! Meanwhile, unbeknownst to any except the all-seeing camera, the owner is using the employees' pensions to buy something illegal, whether guns or drugs.

The A-Team is on the case! The corporate capitalist pig owner of the factory must be made accountable for his wage system, and he must let the workers unionize. The A-Team goes in, guns a-blazing,with the help of the workers, fighting against the mercenary goon squad hired by the owner for his protection.

After all the fighting has been accomplished, the corporate capitalist pig owner has either been forced to flee leaving all of the money behind, or has been arrested, thereby releasing his hold of the factory. The workers, having risen up against their capitalist corporate masters, rejoice and take ownership of the factory for themselves, ensuring a better life for all.

Then they rename Hannibal "Gorky" and build statues of him in parks all over the county. (I think this last part is implied in the closing credits.)

Anyway, you can see that the A-Team was clearly a communist plot to poison the minds of the American Children in order to destroy the capitalist state. To think that this show was a huge hit during the Reagan era! I blame it for the downfall of American society and I blame it's cancellation for the lack of good television programming.