Sunday, July 03, 2005

EXCLUSIVE- Scott McClellan sits down and kibbutzes with Three Bulls!


Pinko Punko: Scott, thank you for joining us. As you know, this conversation, while ostensibly posted on the internets, will not really be read by anyone, so you can be fully frank, just keep it clean.

Scott: Well, thank you for having me. How do you want to work this?


Pinko Punko: Well, we were planning on having the Nutter, youpirateoverlord, and The Uncanny Canadian come in and ask you some questions, and observe how you respond.

Scott: That seems fine.

Pinko Punko: C'mon in guys
(Enter the questioners)

Pinko Punko: Let's begin- Uncanny?

Uncanny Canadian: Scott can you comment on Rove situation regarding the Plame leak?

Scott: *beeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeep*

UC: What did-

Scott: *boooooooop*

UC: Wha-

Scott: *boop*

UC: What the fu-

Scott: *beeep* *booop*

UC: *ucking douche!

Pinko Punko: Uh, that's enough, let's move on to the next question.

yourpirateoverlord: Scott, can you comment on this administration's penchant for nominating people for positions of which they are either critical of of for which they are unqualified? I'm thinking of the Bolton Nomination.

Scott: myah, myan myan myah myah myah. myan myah myan myah myah.
(While answering, Scott seems to be making flappy-mouth gestures with his hands, and mincing about like a ponce, whatever that means. Seriously what does that mean? It just seems like he is doing it)

ypo: I'm sorry, I didn't understand your response- let me-

Scott: MYAH MYAN MYAH, MYAH MYAHMYAHMAYH MYAH MYAH MYAN MYAH.

ypo: Jeesus H.

Pinko Punko: Last question, Nutter?

Nutter: Scott, what are your thoughts about Harry Reid's tough comments?

Scott: Nutter, I think your misinterpreting my words, I didn't call Sen. Reid a douchebag, I'm not sure I can agree with your statement, but I definitely can't disagree either, I'm sure a lot of people reasonably feel that way.

Nutter: Uh, I didn't call Sen. Reid a douchebag-

Scott: Uh I did unt call sen a tor Reid a doosh bag.

Nutter: Did you just repeat back what I said in robot voice?

Scott: Did yu just reee peat back what I said in row bot vooice.

Nutter: You are a complete moron.

Scott: u r a com pleate more on.

Pinko Punko: Well I think that wraps it up. Scott, do you mind if I try to dissect your strategy?

Scott: No, go right ahead.

Pinko Punko: So when Uncanny came in, you just answered him in a series of non-sensical *beep* *boop* sounds.

Scott: I'd say it was slightly more sophisticated than that, but I felt I conveyed what need to be conveyed.

Pinko Punko: And when yourpirateoverlord asked you a question, you just mocked him/her in a high pitched whiny mocking voice.

Scott: I really the think the key to conveying information there is the dance, actually.

Pinko Punko: Finally, when the Nutter asked you about Senator Reid, first you twisted his words, then you repeated everything he said in a bizarre monotone, almost computerized voice.

Scott: The word twisting* and the other thing don't have to go together, but I feel you get a synergy in information conveyance that way.

Pinko Punko: Scott, may I ask you one more question?

Scott: *boooooooooooooooooop*

*Disallowed Guiness record attempt at word twisting here. Judges ruled that words weren't being twisted, the guy was just making sh*t up. Sadly, thanks.